The Older Woman’s Guide to Crossfit: Pt 3
CrossFit Session Four:
For those who are reading this and contemplating taking up CrossFit, I’d like to share a few pointers from today. There are morals to these stories, so please listen up.
Wet pants, farts and other embarrassments
Earlier today I had two vaccinations, one in each arm. As the nurse was scrubbing my shoulder with alcohol, I asked her in a clear, loud voice, so there could be no miscommunication, if there would be any consequences later. You know, like a fever, or sleepiness or perhaps even sore, stiff shoulders. She assured me there wouldn’t. She lied.
Raising my elbows more than thirty degrees resulted in two distinct points of pain, and you really don’t need any additional pain in your early sessions of CrossFit. There’s quite enough already. So try not to get stuck with needles on your CrossFit day.
My second lesson was to get better prepared. I remembered to wash my leggings but forgot to dry them and, as I only have one pair, I had to wear them wet. I did contemplate wearing something else but figured that the leggings would be wet with sweat within a minute or so, so there was no point. But still, clambering into them, then driving while damp was an experience I could easily have skipped.
My other suggestion is not to get dressed in a rush. When I came home today, I noticed that I’d gone the whole session looking sexy and well-put together by wearing my top inside out, seams showing and two tags flapping. Cool.
The last thing involves gas (not the car kind) and maybe experienced CrossFitters can weigh in in the comments section with their experience. It seems that even if I go to the session with a decent flat stomach, by the end of it, I’m all bloated. I’ve also got uncomfortable pain in my stomach, especially if I’m standing around, and I spend the last ten minutes anxiously anticipating that I’m going to completely embarrass myself by tooting as I perform a dead lift squat no doubt to be heard by my class, if not the whole box.
Together, but divided
Our group of six is still intact after a little wobble on Friday when two members didn’t show up. We are dividing into two distinct groups. There are those who arrive early and immediately start warming up in a quiet section of the box. And then there are those who sit on the leather sofa waiting for the class to begin, and conserving their energy. I’m in the latter group. Believe me, I don’t have any spare energy for extra warm-ups.
Fake it, ’til you make it
I decided to embrace the idea of my fourth CrossFit session today. I told myself I would look forward to it, enjoy it, love the sweat rolling down my back and revel in the sip of water which relieves my dry throat (and, to be honest, gives me a second or two of extra breathing time.)
Today, it was the return of our original trainer. The one that gave us a hella workout last week with an ungodly amount of push-ups that I needed to modify, and then modify some more. I have no upper body strength from the top of the ribs up.
Did I tell you that as a kid, when it came time to climb the ropes in gym class, I would simply stand there and watch the other kids climb like monkeys until that part was over? I didn’t even try. Even at seven I knew that if my legs weren’t involved, I wasn’t going anywhere. I was so unable to climb that not even being yelled at from across the room by our fierce gym teacher, Miss Mackintosh (she was Scottish :-)) fazed me. It was simply an impossibility. Like pigs and flying.
Anyhow, I thought it would be a good idea to get some push-up practice in over the weekend, so I did four sets of five push-ups each day and there was an improvement on last week. Go me!
We ran, we rowed, we stretched, we squatted. I can do those things. I can also do back squats with the training bar but the front ones were hard. I need to strengthen and stretch my triceps among other things. For our WOD, I continued to use the training (lightest) bar. Thank god for training bars is all I can say about that.
Today’s WOD was three rounds of 15, 12 and 9 each of front squats (with the bar) and burpees. OMG, those first two rounds of burpees were hard. But I finished! And I didn’t fart.